Auburn Police responded to the following calls for service, among many others, between April 11 and 16:

April 11

Funny money: 6:59 a.m., 702 Auburn Way S. Someone jonesing for a mouthful of Ronald McDonald’s classic American cuisine used false money to cover the cost of his or her gustatory yearnings.

Recovered stolen vehicle: 11:45 a.m., 1520 Outlet Collection Way SW. Although police recovered a stolen F250 after a minor collision with a semi truck, its driver was gonesville.

Trespassing: 7:12 p.m., 801 Auburn Way N. For wrongdoing undisclosed, Fred Meyer invited a woman to exit into Auburn’s great outdoors, and stay there.

April 12

Ride and run: 2:43 p.m., 900 block of 18th Street Northeast. A woman left a taxi without paying.

Commercial burglary: 6 p.m., 4248 A St. SE. Someone stole a paint sprayer from Marquez Pro Painting Services, value undisclosed.

April 13

Vandalism: Overnight, 200 block of 6th Street Southeast. A woman reported damage to her husband’s truck.

Vandalism: 1:45 p.m., 2000 block of Auburn Way North. Denied a room at one of Auburn’s swanky hotels, a woman took her disappointment out on a window.

Theft: 3 p.m., 1000 block of 28th Street Northeast. Police busted a man who had stolen a gas-powered saw from a construction site.

April 14

Trespassing: 6:13 a.m., 11 3rd St. NW. The Auburn Post Office told a woman she was not wanted there.

Fraud: 7:50 a.m., 3710 A St. SE. A man took a taxi from Des Moines to Auburn, then whipped out a forged $100 bill to pay his fare.

Theft: Overnight, 630 block of Spokane Avenue S. Somebody stole automatic gate equipment from a house in Pacific.

April 16

Bogus Benjamin: 3:50 p.m., 2300 Ron Crockett Drive NW. When a man placing a bet at Emerald Downs handed a $100 bill to a cashier, the sharp-eyed cashier realized it was bogus. Subsequent investigation revealed that someone at the track had passed the note earlier, and the victim got it in a race-win payout.